Posted by karlahagan on May 10, 2013 in A Story, Blog | 0 comments
Does this look like a weapon to you?
It was this morning, believe it or not? I had just left the girls’ room after giving them their 3 “to-do’s” – brush your hair, make your bed and put away your laundry! It was not a few seconds later that I heard screams and the pitter patter of one of these “girl people” in my home! Tears, offense and the story of being whacked upside the head by the “weapon” pictured left! It was a terrible moment for the victim – I mean real tears.
So, of course, the attacker quickly followed the victim with a story of her own. “She was ignoring me. I asked her a question, and she wouldn’t answer. She does this all the time . . . . ”
Sigh from Mama Bear and a prayer from Mama Bear to Father God for a good idea. We debriefed about the ordeal, took another deep breath and made plans for next time. Then, I told them to create their own consequences.
They both ended up looking up verses in their Bible. The victim did not know where to look, but the attacker having done this a few times before led her to the word: “tongue.” So, they both looked up verses about our mouth and the power of our words.
The attacker struggled with finding any good verses to write down, because: “I have written all of these before, Mom.” I paused long enough for the reality of this comment to sink in, but then I couldn’t help myself. Mama Bear replied: “And what does that tell you? You have looked them all up before. Hmmmm. . .” We both smiled.
In a bit, she came to me with a prayer. She said: “I decided just to write this instead of verses.”
These are good days, friends. Conflict is inevitable, you know. Weapons will be used. But it is the conversation, the deep breaths and the place we take them to work through the conflict. This is what we do as parents to the “boy or girl people” in our homes.
We cannot do this alone. Father God is present, listening and offering his hand to all of us. Victim or Attacker – we have all been both before. And to both of us, he says: “I have loved you with an everlasting love. I have drawn you with my loving kindness. Remain in me, and I will remain in you. How great is the love that we should be called children of God. Call to me, and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things that you do not know. You are mine.” (Jeremiah 31:3, John 15:4, 1 John 3:1, Jeremiah 33;3 and Isaiah 43:1)