“Shoulders Back!” (God card #42 – Warrior)

For me in this week, “Shoulders Back” was my act of faith, my acknowledgement of the battle going on and my offensive position in it all! “Shoulders Back” was my battle cry!

“For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, we have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:3-5

I was sitting in the doctor’s office with Carson, and we had been waiting for some time. My son, miserable with sinus congestion and a headache that prevented him from lifting his head, was patiently waiting for the doctor to arrive while his mother on the other hand was sinking lower and lower in her chair. Carson was now the second of three children sick. And his mother was herself on her second week of sinus congestion and sickness. I truly believed and unfortunately still toy with the idea as I write that I will never be able to breathe freely from my nose again. So, to put it bluntly, I am sick of sick! I am sick of waking up feeling miserable. I am sick of not being able to make it better for my kids. I am sick of Kleenex and snot and coughs without covering your mouth!

So, in my “sinking” disposition, I remember breathing: “Father?” I was too tired to pray and honestly, I was angry now too. Words weren’t coming, and this was all I had: “Father?” And his reply to me, just then, in my head, a whisper: “shoulders back.”

In that moment in the doctor’s office with my son next to me hurting, I remember toying with the idea – “shoulders back?” In order to do this, I had to lift my body from its sinking position, and it caused to breathe deep and gaze forward. As I went for it, I realized it put me in a position of strength and readiness. And it did make me realize – I was slumping, sinking inward to my issues and anger and demands. My body language was showing my heart. I was giving in to the “sinking lie” ever so slightly but nonetheless apparent as I realized how far I was from a “shoulders back” position. Oh, what a painful act of faith! It also reminded me of our kitchen table conversation the day before.

We had studied God card #42 – Warrior. I believe Father God stands watch and fights for me. One of the verses on the card is the story in 2 Chronicles 20 of Jehoshaphat defeating Moab and Ammon.

“For the battle is not yours . . . . You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions. Stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you, O Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.”
It is such a cool story of Father God delivering his people from the hands of their enemy. But he still asked Jehoshaphat and the Israelites to “take their positions and stand firm.” They weren’t on the sidelines sinking in the struggle, while he waged the war and won! They took their place in the battle and went forward singing (2 Chronicles 20:21).

I have the same opportunity, in this moment, to do the same – “take up your position and stand firm.” To assume the position of “shoulders back” says to the enemy, I will not believe your lies. I am not beaten though I feel it. My children are not beaten though I see it. I have the “divine power” right now in this moment to “take these thoughts captive” of defeat. We, the Hagan family, are not sinking. And though our circumstances are not showing this truth at the moment, we believe this battle is not ours. Father God promises to fight for us, and he will be with us. And so, “SHOULDERS BACK,” you /?#%&^? Enemy! Shoulders back!”

I continued to say it throughout the day, and I guess throughout my days since then! Maybe without the expletives! I am taking my position, and I am looking for his win! It is my part in the battle! My place on the line! And I am so grateful I am not alone, and I walk with a Father that fights for me!

I found my grandmother’s Bible this week over at my parent’s house. Carson is actually named after her – Mattie Carson Keathley. She has this hymn taped to the front cover – it is what I am sure the Israelites were singing that day in 2 Chronicles and what we all walk forward singing today!